Monday, December 17, 2012

My reaction to Newtown

Picture enclosed: Vicki Soto who saved several children by putting them in a closet while a cowardly man shot her and the rest of the children in her class.

Last Friday was very difficult for this country. I had a very difficult time swallowing what happened to 26 innocent people, most of which were children who could not defend themselves.

What type of coward does that? Victoria Soto (picture enclosed) saved several children's lives by putting them in a closet only to lose her own life. She will always be deemed as a hero. The principal and psychologist should be deemed as heroes too as they came running when the man broke in to Sandy Hook Elementary School.

I don't know what's tougher: Seeing the pictures of those innocent children who lost their lives or knowing that there are men and women like Adam Lanza that in a moment's time can ruin our lives and destroy the future of this world.

I saw pictures of some of the kids lost and many reminded me of my own. I can't empathize with the parents. I have no idea how they feel. I wouldn't want to know how they feel. I am so sorry for them. I'm sure they are devastated and they will need a huge support team to get them through this. Actually, they'll never get completely through this. They just need a support team to keep them from losing everything.

I know that this man was mentally ill and that the guns were not registered to him. I'm not an advocate of the NRA but I understand that there are some people that should have the right to own firearms. I'm the first to admit that I'm not educated enough to form an opinion on the matter. I just think there are a lot of people who should not have the right to own a gun. I look at my friend Rusty who was shot down and murdered by a man who should not have owned a gun. I look at what happened in Aurora, Colorado and Columbine.

I think the thing that frustrates me most is that this guy took his own life. He should have been apprehended and made to suffer. I'm not a violent person but I want to tear this guy apart. He killed innocent children who could not defend themselves...and several adults too. And for the ones who survived, he tore away their innocence forever.

I want to tell the Newtown families that they will be in my prayers now and always. This is truly horrible. I have yet to talk about it with my son or daughter but I'm sure that someday Andrea and I will need to discuss it with them. There are some really horrible people in this world and they aren't satisifed until they ruin the lives of others who did nothing to hurt them. Who knows? We could have lost the person who was going to cure cancer or who was going to give birth to that person. We could have lost a future president of this fine country. We could have lost doctors, nurses and lawyers who could help make this world a better place. The sad thing is that we'll never know. The sadder thing is that many of these children not only did not get to realize their dreams, they didn't even have enough time to have any sort of dream of what they wanted to do in the future.

I ask myself what would I have done if I were the mother of the future killer. She knew he had problems but she tried to diffuse them herself. It's not like she asked him to do these things and from all accounts she was a great mom. I'm sure if she could go back in time, she would change things. Still if my kids were like him, would I do anything different? I would like to think so but I have no idea.

How about the killer's brother? He will be villified for a very long time. He lost his mother and his brother. His last name will be placed amongst other awful mass murderers like Bundy, Manson and Dahmer. His life is ruined. From all accounts, he also did nothing wrong.

How about the girl who lost her twin brother? She was one of the children put in a closet by Ms. Soto while her brother was killed. Twenty children lost their lives! 20!!! Six innocent adults lost theirs too.

What is wrong with the world today? That's the question that seems to be posed the most. I don't think it's the world that is all that messed up; it's just a few individuals. The difference between now and then is that there are a lot more things that these people can get their hands on and we have the Internet that will help broadcast all of the horrible things going on. Sadly, some of these people want the fame and exposure of committing horrific acts like this.

To the children and adults who lost their lives on Friday, I am so sorry that you won't be amongst us going forward. No one should have to die the way you did nor should they have to do it so early in life. I promise that you will always be remembered.

I've heard the expression "Everything happens for a reason." I don't think this is a place that this applies. Maybe there will be tougher handgun laws from this. Maybe security in schools will improve even greater. The thing is that it will never bring these people back and that's what I know their families would prefer.

I am the type of person who loves to fix things but I don't know how to fix this. The families will never be totally healed. These people aren't coming back. There will always be guns and cowardly human beings who will use them for the wrong reasons.

I am still scared any time we hire a new babysitter because of the abuse I suffered when I was a little boy. I'm still scared to leave my daughter or son in a room alone with someone due to the issues I had with the daughter of a family friend. Now, though this didn't affect me personally, I will be nervous any day that my children go to school because there are scary people like this one who took out 26 innocent human beings. Life is supposed to be something we should each enjoy. I'm a motivational speaker and that's my message whenever I give talks. Today I'm not a motivational speaker. I'm as scared as any of you about the future of this world. How can we have faith in a higher power when horrible things happen to innocent people? It's difficult to believe in God or anything else right now.

How can we enjoy life knowing that people like Adam Lanza exist? How are we supposed to feel safe? How are our children supposed to feel safe?

I can't answer any of those questions.

I suppose for me that's the most difficult thing.


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