This is a blog that Andy has written to describe his battle with cystic fibrosis. Andy is 40 years old and is married to his beautiful bride Andrea and has two miracle children, Avery and Ethan. Andy appreciates each day and hopes to show the doubters that in his world CF stands for Can Fight!
Thursday, February 23, 2012
I'm behind Andrea Sneiderman, my friend!
So a friend of mine was hanging out at the lake the other day while my wife and her husband were on his boat racing across the lake. She and I had a good talk. We talked about how lucky we were to have met our soul mates and how great life truly was. We have joked at dinner many times. We have been to movies and parties together with our significant others, etc. This woman is a great mother and a great friend.
Andrea Sneiderman was that person who told me how lucky she was, she was referring to her soul mate Rusty Sneiderman, and this relaxing time at the lake was the summer of 2010, just a few months before Rusty was murdered. This same Andrea Sneiderman is being burned at the stake the first 2 days of a trial which is supposed to be about the fact that she lost her soul mate to an evil villain, a murder in which SHE HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH. I have gotten texts and e-mails asking me if I still support her and if I'm ok. This isn't about me so I am ok. Do I still support my friend? I have one answer: YES!
I believe Andrea and I believe in Andrea. She is a good person. I'm honestly wondering how trusting these "witnesses" are. I wonder why there's been nothing to talk about their pasts. You know why there's been no discussion about their backgrounds? That's because the prosecution and defense have an agenda. They want to paint a picture of a "cheating" wife and an adoring lover. They want to make a movie for "Lifetime." Life isn't TV though. Sometimes it's much simpler. Andrea has no one to defend her up there and that just doesn't seem right. Today she even got thrown out of court for "hugging the witnesses after their testimony." Are you kidding me? I'm here to defend her. Court is now in session. I'm presiding.
Let's look at a few things first.
1. On the news, they had someone analyze Andrea's testimony and they surmised that Andrea is most likely telling the truth. I appreciate the media for doing this type of analysis.
2. The real estate agent is the one that this guy was telling all his "sexual" stuff to? How screwed up is that? She wore her real estate tag on the stand. She mentioned that "referrals" are what she loves. Is this a witness that we can really hedge our bets on? I have no ill will towards her. I'm sure she said what she remembered BUT she was listening to some delusional killer. Who do you believe? A crazy killer or Andrea? Duh!
3. The bartender - she's a bartender and she is expected to remember specific things from more than a few months earlier about two people who she could care less about remembering at the time. That's ridiculous. She can’t remember how many drinks they had but can remember all other details. And she has a receipt to refer back to and she still doesn’t remember. Again, I'm not saying anything bad about the bartender but I find it hard to believe that she can remember something specific like this happening especially when these 2 people mattered to her as much as 2 people mattered to me that drove past me in traffic today.
4. The timeline is completely off in this case. The jurors actually requested to see it again. That should tell you something.
5. She called her boss several minutes after she found out something happened to Rusty. Put yourself in her shoes. Something happens to a family member and you have to leave the office and it is really bad. Of course you call your boss and try him till you reach him.
6. If the defense and prosecution has found every single e-mail between Andrea and Hemy, WHY then do I ask you is there NOT A SINGLE E-MAIL where Andrea shares "romantic" feelings with Hemy. Every single e-mail I've seen that has any romance in it was brought on by Hemy and there has been no "passionate" reciprocating from Andrea.
7. This case is NOT about Andrea Sneiderman. She was not charged nor will she be charged in this case. Andrea is innocent. I defend her and I don't care what anyone says, I always will. I stake my reputation on my friend and will continue to. When the going gets rough, friends stick by their friends.
Andrea has been totally cooperative with the police and look where that has gotten her. Let me tell you briefly about another case somewhat similar to this one. After Leiby Kletzky was murdered in NY, the mother of the murdered child did not speak to the media. When commenting about why she wasn’t speaking out, that mother replied “I already lost one son. It is very important to my family privacy that I shouldn’t lose the rest of my family’s regular life. I just want to continue with regular life to the extent that it is possible given the extent of this horrific and impossible loss. “ Andrea shares this same principle.
She did not have anything to do with the murder of her husband. I repeat: She had nothing to do with the murder of her husband. That is ALL that should matter. All of you saw a stoic faced and some would say "angry" Andrea on the stand. First off, I know Andrea and that face was "defiance." She knows she didn't do this and she also is frustrated that she is being accused of hurting the love of her life. When you're not guilty of something and someone accuses you, wouldn't you be pissed? People say she doesn't play the victim. That's right. That's not her style. She's not going to act up there. She has had her victim moments. Believe me. I have witnessed so many.
What you didn't see, what the cameras have not shown you was that same "defiant" person put her hands to her face and ball for several minutes when they brought out a similar weapon to the one that killed her husband. What the media didn't show you was how devastated she was at Shiva and at the hospital after her husband died. What the media didn't show you was all of the work she has put in to make sure her husband will be remembered - with her help, The Wish for Wendy Softball Challenge has an entire sponsorship program named after her husband. What the media didn't show you was Andrea gleaming with pride when her daughter told me "Thank you for talking about my dad in your book." That person did not commit any crime. That person is not cold and calculated like these attorneys are trying to make her look.
This trial is about Hemy Neuman and this trial is about Rusty Sneiderman. Hemy took Rusty's life and deserves to go to prison forever. That's the bottom line. Hemy Neuman took away a father, a son, a brother, a husband and a friend. Hemy Neuman divided so many people. Hemy Neuman knew right from wrong otherwise he would not have hid from Rusty the first time he stalked him in his yard. Hemy Neuman would not have bought a disguise or attempt to bribe the previous gun owner if he did not know right from wrong. Hemy Neuman needs to rot in prison.
Back to this trial, I'm sick of the vultures who are going to the media like these people with cameras are dead carcasses on the side of the road. I speak of one lawyer in particular who has been trying to sensationalize this case from the beginning. She has been making a small commotion in the courtroom whenever my friend's reputation has been tarnished. She has been looking for the Today Show and Good Morning America like she was in the desert and these two shows were the last two drinks of water on the planet. I've actually seen and heard that this same person has been asking "How did I look on the Today Show?" This woman has had little to nothing to do with this case. She has been admonished several times. I refuse to mention her name on this blog. She knows who she is and most of you know who she is if you've been watching the national news. Heck, if I mention her, she might ask how she looked in my blog. This woman is taking joy in how "she looks" during a trial in which a horrible tragedy took place.
You know who you are and I'm talking to you. Leave my friend alone. Do your job and support your client. Your client has nothing to do with this case anymore and so guess what? Neither do you. I'm begging shows like Today to have some ethics and stop putting her in front of the camera. I've respectfully said "no" to the media as have several of my friends. People like this woman give lawyers a bad name. My dad is an attorney as are many of my friends. I respect what they do. I want my kids to see what a good attorney looks like. I want them to learn about ethics. Ma’am, get off the TV so I can let my kids watch again. Until then, we'll focus on The Disney Channel although truly, you're the one, madam attorney, who looks like GOOFY.
I am done writing. My friend Andrea needs some PR help. I'm doing my part. I ask my friends, her friends, to help give her that. She's a good person. She's a strong woman (not the bitch that the media is making her out to be). This case is about the man who killed one of my best friends. I ask that the defense and prosecution remember that starting tomorrow morning. Avenge my friend's death. Rusty Sneiderman was one of my best friends. He was a great man. Being a great man, he knew how to find a great woman. He did. That woman is Andrea Sneiderman. I try in my heart to honor Rusty every day through speaking out about great causes and through fundraising. I know Rusty would want me to do what I think is right at this time. And in my heart, defending my friend feels right. I'm hoping many others will too.
Andrea, I love you and I support you and I am here for you regardless of what people say about you and regardless of what people say about me for supporting you. That's how I treat my friends. That's how you've always treated your friends and I have never forgotten that and I have never forgotten our conversation at the lake.
Live your dreams and love your life!
Andy
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For the last 15 months, I've often thought about the last time I saw a happy Andrea Sneiderman.
ReplyDeleteIt was November 6th, 2010, the day of Wish for Wendy. Andrea walked into synagogue decked out in sweats to pick up their daughter from religious school.
I teased Andrea about how she was dressed for synagogue, and she told me about how she and Rusty were involved in Wish for Wendy.
She went on to say how close Rusty and Andy were, and how active he was with W4W that year. She spoke with such a tremendous pride in her husband and such a gleam in her eye that it really made an impression on me as to how deeply in love with him she was.
I contrast to the many times I have seen Andrea since 11/18/2010, and how she has been utterly devastated. I won't go into details out of respect for her, suffice it to say that it is clear to those who know her that her life has been turned upside down.
And I wonder if I'll ever see that gleam in her eyes again.
Thanks for writing this, Andy, and doing your part, and for reminding us all who Andrea really is.
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ReplyDeleteAndrea really should not have testified at all in this trial. It is certainly not helping her, and it's only serving to make Hemy look more insane. Certainly her $2million insurance payout is in jeopardy. Where is her attorney?! He is awful to have let her go up there 2 days in a row appearing to be belligerent, even if it was really 'defiance' as you say. She is not getting responsible advice, and I feel for her for that reason.
ReplyDeleteI want to believe Andrea completely, but I am having trouble with these issues-
1) Why did Don Sneiderman testify that Andrea told him at 9:30am that Rusty had been shot, when Andrea claims not to know Rusty had been shot until 11:30am? Donna (the preschool director) testified that she did not tell Andrea that Rusty had been shot because she was concerned about Andrea driving safely to the school.
2) Why didn't Andrea tell the police that she thought Hemy had murdered Rusty as soon as she suspected it? She waited a week to tell the cops after she told her friend. Her response is that the situation had ruined her life and that was why she didn't inform the police. Rusty's parents and brother seem so grateful to the police, Andrea seems like she is against them at every turn. And why does Rusty's family so obviously have ill will towards her if she is just a victim in this mess?
3) Why did she want to retrieve her work computer immediately after the murder? That would be SO FAR from my mind if I had been in her position.
4) Why did Andrea embrace Shayna, and then outside the courtroom tell her off with a "You're not my friend anymore" statement? It is not a good sign that she was nice to Shayna (whom she was forbidden to have any contact with) in front of the jury, but in the hallway she tried to hurt her feelings. It could not have been easy for Shayna to testify against Andrea. You might not like the bartender's testimony, but why would Shayna lie about anything or say she disbelieved her friend? She seemed fully upset to have to testify.
Please understand that I WANT TO BELIEVE ANDREA HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE MURDER WHATSOEVER. I was friendly with Rusty and Andrea some time ago, and I cannot imagine her doing anything sinister to anyone. But I can't blindly believe every word she says (though I sympathize with her a great deal). If you want to delete this comment, fine. But you need to open your mind to the fact that you do not have the whole story.
Sadly, my guess is that a wrongful death suit against Andrea will be brought by Rusty's family and we'll hear more then. At least Andrea will have the chance to defend herself. I hope she's got a lot of answers, and that the next time she testifies someone coaches her on jury management before she gets up on the witness stand.
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ReplyDeleteYour loyalty to your friend is comendable. But her comment, "do you know what this had done to my life" is not playing well for me! Look what's it's done to Rusty's life! He does not have one! Those witnesses have no reason to lie. I don't think she's telling the truth...AT ALL!
ReplyDeleteUnlike perhaps some (most?) people, I found Andrea Sneiderman's testimony completely believable, and having been in several close working relationships with members of the opposite sex myself, I have first hand knowledge of what the truth is vs. what a lot of observers think, but they only think they know what's happening between two people - they don't really know.
ReplyDeleteAs a judge once said to a witnes in a trial I was participating in, "If you say you know something, then you know why you know it - you saw it, you touched it, or you tasted it. There's a big difference between thinking you know and knowing."
It doesn't surprise me at all that Andrea and Hem went to a lot of places together - in my work, I have often traveled to many of these same places with members of the opposite sex, either a subordinate or as a subordinate, and there's absolutely nothing to it other than the particular meeting requires that level of presence. It does sound like Hemy abused GE's self-directed travel policies, but that's on him - as his subordinate, Andrea went where she was asked, or thought she should go, and Hemy is the one who abused his position of authority by tacking himself onto the trip when in some cases, his presence might not have been needed. But that's on him, not her.
And I find it completely credible that, even if she did hold hands with and kiss Hemy on an occasion in that bar, that's as far as it went, she regretted it, and was completely truthful when she said "There was no affair". I've been in exactly the same situation, and done exactly the same thing, and while an eye in the sky might say "Those two are getting it on", you come to your senses, realize you're heading down a slippery slope, and stop it right there - and there was no affair, but I'm sure an outside observer who thinks 1st base inevitable leads to home plate would say, "Those two are having an affair". But it is totally believable that a person of character could stop the situation from proceeding down the slippery slope, perhaps regret that it went as far as it did, and be completely accurate and honest when they say "There was no affair".
This isn't parsing, like "it depends on what the meaning of the word 'is' is". It's easy for me to believe that it didn't happen - because the exact same thing has happened to me. And a thousand lookie-loos observing that a co-worker and I were traveling to the same hotels, and observing an occasional kiss or holding hands, and jumping to a conclusion that my good friend and co-worker and I were having an affair doesn't make it so.
So my best wishes go out to Andrea Sneiderman, and I hope this part of her nightmare is over soon. I'm sure she feels remorseful that she didn't report Hemy's advances to HR, or nip it in the bud sooner and more aggressively when he started going out of bounds, and that's probably haunting her daily. If she had, he very likely would have immediately been fired, and this probably would not have happened.
But at the time, caught up in it, she couldn't see that as the outcome - or perhaps, since he was a friend, she didn't want to ruin his career over this, and decided she could handle it herself.
So I hope in time she can forgive herself for not being more assertive about Hemy's advances - she deserves a chance to move on from here. Best of luck to her and her kids.
I feel very bad for your friend. As you know, Andy, I also lost my husband to murder and I can well remember how difficult it was to have to face the killers and how angry one can become with the ridiculous questions being asked. The need for details when they are not even relevant to the case, can frustrate anyone. I watched the trial online as Andrea was being questioned and really felt for her because I could see that her words and meanings were being twisted. I know how attorneys are when they are trying to create a scenario and are using the victim for their own purposes. I'm sure the defense doesn't plan to put Neuman on the stand and they were trying to show him as a sympathic person by getting his story out through her. As for people talking about how a person is supposed to act when her husband has just been killed...I can honestly say that they don't know what the heck they are talking about...I do. There is no rule book. It's the most devastating thing in the world and there are some things you remember and some things that may be fuzzy. Some things you even believe you know and find out that you are wrong. I did that when Bill was killed. I had some details in my head that others later told me were not the way I thought. But that's due to the shock surrounding the immediate realization that you have lost the most important person in your life. Please tell Andrea that some of us can see what she is going through. The truth will eventually be brought to light and if there are people who want to draw their own conclusions, they aren't worth her concern. She has her family and her close friends. She will survive this and be able to keep those good memories of that fine man in her heart and mind and share them with the children.
ReplyDeleteWell today (2/28/2012) was not a day that helped Andrea's credibility. This is getting to be a trend. Why call your boss 1500 times in 6 months? She also has some suspicious cell phone tower activity as well. It just gets worse. There has not been one day where something suspicious has not come out. Could they be leading her into a trap for a charge later? Who knows? They should be. There has to be something going on here. The phone, email, testimony, etc. etc., support that completely.
ReplyDeleteShe is and was a devious woman. She knew he was shot. How did she know that? Her lover boss told her on that phone call. She hugged her friend in court and in the hallway told her off. I loathed her at the trial and still do. Wish she had spent more time in jail. Rusty did not deserve her.
ReplyDelete