Monday, September 13, 2010

Bye Bye Summer

Good morning everyone. Welcome to another week in our lives. I had a nice weekend. I got to see several friends although this might have been the worst weekend in Atlanta sports history. Georgia Tech, Georgia, Georgia State and Georgia Southern all lost. The Falcons and Braves both lost yesterday. I think my hopes of having a championship this season - the first in 15 years for this city - rides on our women's WNBA team. Go Atlanta Dream! Has my life as a fan really come to this? I am excited to watch the Nadal-Djokovic US Open Final today. My worst fears though are that my Dawgs will lose to the Vols again this season. Andrea and I have a running bet that whichever team wins, our kids have to wear the team's outfit the following day. See the attached nightmare that I dealt with in previous years. Ethan (the picture attached), I'm sorry and daddy loves you. Hopefully Coach Richt will do what he can to protect you and your sister from wearing that color this year.

Tonight is the opening game in our fall softball season. I'm excited to get started, but a bit scared too. No, I'm not scared about softball. I'm scared because the summer is nearly over. It's not because I will miss the hot weather nor because I like vacationing. Granted, these are two things that make the summer special, but those aren't the reasons I'll miss this warm season. I'm actually scared of the fall and winter.

Those are the two time periods where my depression really seems to soar. First off, due to the colder conditions and some of the particles in the air (ragweed), I always seem to get sick this time of year and therefore my pulmonary function numbers go quite a bit down. I've reacted that way to the cold weather since before I can remember. Second, the days end earlier in the winter and it's a lot tougher to go outside and exercise. That's why I now play in a basketball league in the winter. I want to make up for not playing softball and having less opportunities to go running outside. It was last November that I admitted myself into a rehabilitation facility. Don't think that fact and the actions that put me there are not constant reminders in my head. Also, looking at the other picture attached (Grizzly Adams Lipman), I don't want to be that guy again. While I'm smiling in that picture, that was one of those moments where depression was getting the bet of me. I didn't care what I looked like nor what I did. I'm not going back there. By the way, the beard was real and it was spectacular.

Here's the good news. Through the rehabilitation process, I've learned how to cope with my concerns. I've learned how to work a 12-step program and how to deal with my triggers. Today my sponsor and I will complete Step 8. I'm really excited about that fact. Only four more steps to go after today and I will have completed the 12-step process. I'll explain step 8 later but I can tell you it's the most grueling step for me because it forces me to go back and remember my issues and why I'm in a 12-step program. It also forces me to remember the people I hurt for quite some time.

I'm proud though that my sobriety is at 10 months today. I know there are a lot of people who can't even make it 10 days. I also know that if my sobriety ended today, 10 months would not mean anything. My goal is life-long sobriety.

Well, that's it for today. I wish all of you a happy and healthy week. Let's hope the Braves can get it together soon because otherwise Andrea's going to have to deal with me complaining about Bobby Cox, Frank Wren and Nate McLouth for the next four months! Pitchers and catchers report in about 20 weeks, folks...wahoo!

Have a good one.


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